The 7 year itch... 1.0

For whatever reason, I find I am coming to many conclusions about myself and my life now that I'm entering into my 7th year as a Stay-At-Home-Mom (SAHM). 

I will do my best to try and spit this out in some sort of coherent fashion-  

• First and foremost-being a SAHM was my desire, dream and wish; all of which my Rob graciously supported. 
• Being a SAHM is difficult on so many areas of a women's life. So many that I have just now begun to realize how many in the last 6 months of this almost 7 year career.

THEN: 
From H.S. on, I knew that I wanted to take the route my mom did and stay home with my kids until they went to school.  I honestly never planned on having a "career" and therefore never considered what it would be like to have a career and then NOT have a career. 
I was good at my job, actually very good... I didn't do what I studied in college, but I know that my degree set me up to be successful in the working world.
All the while I was working this career (8 years) the one thing I couldn't wait for was the day my prince charming would come along and make me a wife and mother. 

FAST FORWARD:  7 years, 1 marriage, 1 ex-wife, 3 kids, 2 dogs, 1 cross-country-move, 1 brewery, 12 million loads of laundry and dishes later, here I am. 

Wait.... Here who is? 

Who am I?

What happened to Scary Mary? 
Scary Mary who moved from city to city, pay grade to pay grade, promotion to promotion? 
Where did she go? 

How in the world did I lose her? 

I read all the articles on how NOT to lose myself to motherhood. I went to movies, coffee, and dinners with my friends. Rob and I go on dates and take trips (without the kids) often... etc. etc. 
How did this happen?  Did I let this happen?

TODAY: 

Yes... these are the "hardships" of SAHM-ness that I am just beginning to uncover and figure out how to rectify.

Like Stella- Scary needs to get her groove back. 

Watch out folks- Mary just realized Scary's gone missing! Buckle up and get ready for the recovery mission...

Peace out - Mary Wendy

Addiction sucks

Late last night it was announced that Cory Monteith (Finn from Glee) had been found dead. They haven't released cause of death but supposition is from a possible overdose due to his recent stay in rehab from substance abuse along with his age (he was 31).

I'm unashamedly a Gleek. I love what the show has done for the arts awareness and music in general. There's kids out there that know the lyrics to The Beatles, Meatloaf, Areosmith, 80's hip hop, etc... 

I can't help but be sad about his death. Not just because of I was rooting for his character, not just for his family/friends/coworkers, but for the younger generation of fans. I know how invested in my shows, characters, and actors that portray them I get and I'm an adult. I hurt for the 11 year girl who had a crush on Finn. I hurt for the 10 year old boy who was inspired by the character to be more than what was expected of him by himself and his peers. 

My thoughts and prayers are with his family and friends. I hope he found the peace in death that he may not have had in life.