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Thursday, March 21, 2013

Potato Candy the Dawny Wendy Way



I always start with a six pack when I make my potato candy because I inevitably make too much potato. Now, I drink beer, I'm not a fancy schmancy wine drinker like my fellow Wendy's. 

So, anyway, I open my first beer and take a big swig to gear myself up. I repeat to myself "one potato, Dawny. One potato will do just fine". Then I peel and slice three potatoes because it doesn't look like enough and I don't listen to my husband, so why would I listen to myself?

While the taters are boiling and getting tender, I finish my beer and get the table ready with waxed paper, potato masher, and powdered sugar. 

I crack open another beer while I'm looking for my masher because I'm one of those lazy ass moms who uses instant mashed potatoes and this is the only time of the year that I use that stupid masher. 

I finish my second beer while I say to hell with the masher and get out the beater.
By now, I've turned on the Christmas music pretty loud because 1) I've turned into a lightweight since having children and 2) I'm already cursing a bit too much. 

Anyway, now I'm opening my third beer and beating the taters. They don't need to be completely mashed but pretty close. Then I sit down with the mixture (and my beer!) and add about a half bag of powdered sugar. Because I'm slightly loopy, I always get a little kick out of how adding the sugar turns it into a yellow soup looking mixture. It's the little things that tickle me. 

Now, comes the fun part.. I drink more and add more powdered sugar. I myself need to add bits and bits because if I don't, I make a big damn mess. 

Basically, your mixture when you're finished needs to be a thick, tough, doughy texture. Just a bit thicker than cookie dough. I completely down a beer at this point because if it looks like its supposed to, I'm damn proud of myself. I'm not a baker or chef. I think cooking sucks. But my family likes potato candy. The things I do for them. Jerks.

So now is the fun part. Cool people, people that know where their masher is, will now roll the dough on the waxed paper. Not me. I'm a rebel. I use my hands. My waxed paper is set out and I've liberally covered it with powder sugar. I grab a handful of dough and then liberally cover that. Swig and smoosh, swig and smoosh. The dough should be about a quarter inch thick. Then cover that with peanut butter. I prefer crunchy so there's a party in my mouth. 

Roll that baby up into a log. Stick it in the fridge so it'll harden then slice an eat. I do not recommend, however, to eat it with beer. Blech. 

This is usually when I nap. I'm buzzed and I've earned it. 

Merry Christmas!

xo Dawn Wendy

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